Friday, April 20, 2007

How not to write a dissertation

I had more than a few 'finishing touches' to add to my dissertation last night before handing in a draft today. So, naturally, I avoid doing anything all day and then sit down to work at about 10pm. Here is the chaos that ensued. I call it, 'The Art of Procrastination:'

22.15 - I'm glad for these raisins I bought to snack on 'cuz I'm hungry. That 'big salad' really didn't fill me up at all. Dang healthiness. Sarah's gone to bed, so I'm all alone. Right...cinematic adaptation. Focus.

23.59 - I've now perfected the art of spinning round on my swivel chair with my eyes closed and stopping right infront of my computer screen, using only the sound of its whirring electrics as a guide. I'm desperate to eat something (work avoidance tactic) but am trying to wait until I'm actually hungry.

00.20 - Procrastinating again. Taking pictures of random things - including myself hiding under the desk. Just had a text from Em. Spend at least 10 minutes staring into space and thinking about things.

00.37 - Wasted a good few minutes devising a keep fit plan for the summer - my arms upset me. Wordcount for adaptation chapter: 485. Oh cwap. Food time!

00.46 - CARBFEST! Rice cake with Philadelphia & sliced tomatoes, followed by left over charlotte potatoes, mmmm.

01.18 - The night is still young! I'm confident. It's in the bag.

01.47 - Facebook....damn you Facebook! Oh, I had to touch up my nail varnish, too.

02.18 - I'm fading fast. That means...crazy early morning stay awake spontaneous boogie woogie time!! This is a skill and has to be done in a way that won't wake up sleeping housemate the medic. So I put on my mp3 player and get dancing like a loon around my room. The Go! Team make this possible today.

02.27 - Looked for jobs in the Echo. No luck, unless I fancy doing something nondescript for 'over 18s' or being a 'driver's mate' - can u imagine?!! hmm.....

03.00 - Goodness me, Classic FM is a bit extreme and experimental at this time of night. It's like being on drugs. This violinist is just messing about! Not the relaxing background music one needs at 3am.

04.26 - I must have dozed orf. Just realised the seriousness of this situation - My draft is going to be utter utter rubbish. In other news, I may be addicted to the 'My Musical' episode of Scrubs which is sheer brilliance. I think I know all of the lyrics!!

05.26 - I gave myself an inspirational pep talk. Four hours until I have to leave for campus & the printers, and inspiration strikes! Still a long way to go but the birds are singing and it's already getting lighter. Will she make it? I feel as though I'd work better if the Crystal Maze theme song was being played through speakers into my room. Almost time for brekkie :)

06.20 - My back hurts. I have sat in three different places during the night to try and remedy this problem, but it still just hurts. Sitting on my bed surrounded by comfy cushions and blankets was the worst decision ever...of the night. Who knows how long I slept?!

06.41 - Eeeeek! That is the sound of genuine panic. If I hadn't spent half my night writing these silly notes on post-its around the place, I might have got further. I think I'll eat cereal. I wish I'd known what I wanted to say earlier last night - now I've got it but just not enough time.

After this point, I worked on autopilot, pausing only to sneeze and throw some bread in the toaster at around 8am. I went onto campus to print my essay (not quite finished but close enough) and guess what? My USB had an error and wouldn't open any of the files. I had old drafts of the chapters, all without quotes and structure etc. and no new ones. I basically felt my heart drop into my shoe. I have an extension - next Wednesday. Great. My dissertation is like a nasty cartoon raincloud that follows me around and ruins everything else that might be considered fun. Well, not tonight. I'm going to CU and it's going to be grrreat!

No comments: